As apna Amir Khan prepares for his second innings at the Oscars, this time just as actor though, promoting the flick ‘Rang De Basanti’. We thought we’d try and analyze as to what went wrong with his first innings with Lagaan, where he was the captain of the pack. Lagaan which broke all possible Box Office records and won all major desi awards, came just short on the grandest stage of them all – The Oscars.

Was it just the same syndrome that affects the Indian cricket team, which wins at home but is a bit off color on phoren shores? Or was it the language barrier…we give you our best five guesses!!!

1. The length of the Film- 3hrs 45 mins (equal to the duration of two Hollywood flicks)

For Indians ‘big is beautiful’ so Aushutosh bhai made sure that he gave the junta one of the biggest hit in the form of one of the longest flicks to hit the screen. But the phirang bhailog seemed to be wondering whether it is the same flim or if it is two of them put together.

2. The game ‘Cricket’ (Americans don’t follow it)

The Oscar’s are Made in American so the khel had to be American too. But cricket being too British didn’t cut much ice in the land where baseball rules. They don’t follow the game nor do they give it a damn.

3. Songs (hamper the narration)

The rustic naach-gana aur nautanki of bollywood isn’t something that the videshi took much interest in. The gaon ki goriyan or the kishan ki gopikas - neither made much of an impact. So the ‘mitwas’ and the ‘ore choris’ ended just increasing the length and disturbing the narration of the storyline.

4. White bashing (or at least that’s what they think)

In salaam namaste Javed Jaferi quips – ‘while in Rome do the Romans’. Lagaan being the story of the rustic countrymen beating up the goras of England gave an impression that it did the same things with, albeit with a twist. It was a tale of the ‘goras being out-done in the game of the goras’. Or more aptly put the choras from champaner actually screwed up Captain Russell and Co., understandably much to the dismay of the gora babulog…

5. And the fifth reason is…

Guys this is too much, I thought no one would be reading this further to get to the fifth reason. It been to much of a task finding out four mistakes with this gem of a flick and you still hanging around for the fifth one…how sick of you!!! All you desh drohis, count the number of times you screemed while Bhuvan was batting or the number of whistles that screeched through the air after he hit the last ball for a sixer!!! Haan
Oscar or no Oscar… No one can beat Bollywood…Enjoy…Cheers…